It’s October 4. Is your city covered in snow? Because ours is. So I’ve decided it’s a great day for a YouTube Throwdown instead of a regular blog post, because quite frankly, the only words that I have for anything right now rhyme with Bucking Smother Bucker Crastard Ass Buck. Or something along those lines.
Chris Abani is one of the most engaging public speakers I’ve ever seen. His life story is equally as amazing (link). If you’ve got the 20 minutes to spare, I highly suggest you spend them watching this. Just one of the incredible tidbits in this speech: before the genocide in Rwanda, the word for “rape” and the word for “marriage” were the same.
If this quote wasn’t so long, I would get it tattooed on my body.
If it does happen to be an arctic tundra wherever you are right now, grab your special someone, cuddle up and listen to this. Just don’t be surprised when you find yourself furiously making out with them like you’re back in grade 9. Pretty sure this song will play some role in my wedding and all that mush.
And this isn’t serious at all, but gawd DAMMIT it’s fabulous.
Enjoy. Sorry I’ve been neglecting you. Football is back.
Enjoy, while you sit on your porch bitching about how hip-hop and R&B just ain’t what they used to be. Now tell those kids to get off your lawn.
This could go on forever and yes, I recognize that I’m largely ignoring the East Coast. Deal with it.
If you’ve got words, please share them. Because I am fresh out.
I’m so late with this. Like, being-the-2,341-person-to-rap-over-the-’A Milli’-beat late. But better late than never. And I’m telling you…if I had never found this man – if I had continued to go through life without experiencing the pure, unadulterated JOY that this man ignites in your soul – I don’t even want to think about it. Just recklessly funny.
Mr Chi City, MAYNE!
There’s even more on his YouTube channel - http://ca.youtube.com/user/MrChiCity3 . You’re welcome.
Things I have accomplished today:
- Waking up to three feet of gatdam snow and not immediately punching a hole in the wall.
- Driving to a meeting in three feet of snow, taking a turn too fast (a.k.a 6 km/hr), somehow picking up speed as my tires locked up, slamming into a curb but not causing any serious damage to my boyfriend’s car (and therefore to myself).
- Making it through a three hour meeting on a snowy Sunday in relatively good spirits when all I wanted to do was lay around on my couch watching football.
- Managing to create a dinner that had all four food groups but yet consisted of only microwavable things and leftovers.
So as I sit down at my computer, full of five-day-old lasanga, you can’t be surprised that I’m not feeling even the slightest bit capable of coming up with any witty original thought. And what happens when Serafina gives in to her innate laziness? YouTube Throwdowwwwn!!!!!1
It’s bizarrely comforting to know that over 1.7 million have been witness to this on YouTube alone:
People that can sing should just automatically be super ugly by default. I know that would basically destroy 80% of the entertainment industry, but how can I enjoy listening to your God given talents when all I want to do is kick you in the box?
Suheir Hammad has two poems that I really give credit to for getting me into spoken word poetry and this is one of them:
This one is for Kelsey:
And some classic shit to send you off with. I’ll refrain from making the typical “hip-hop just isn’t what it used to be” comments, but you can undoubtedly watch for those in a more inspired blog post coming soon.
Pimps up, hoes down.
Blogging on the regular is seriously not as easy as it looks. We have to be creative, witty and original at least once a week and believe me, I have trouble matching my socks in the mornings let alone coming up with ideas. Therefore, it’s time for a YouTube Throwdown!
If you don’t have the time to watch this clip in its entirety, believe me, I understand. It’s 1:28 of your life you will never get back. But let me summarize it for you.
Katie Couric: You’ve cited Alaska’s proximity to Russia as part of your foreign policy experience. What did you mean by that?
Sarah Palin: PANCAKES
Just when you think Common couldn’t get your panties any wetter….in comes Pharrell. Dope video.
You ever like something SO MUCH you actually start to HATE IT because you didn’t come up with it yourself? Yeah.
If this song don’t make you wanna get up and fight a bitch or shake your ass so hard it falls off, I don’t want you reading our blog. Real. Talk.
Aaaand if you need help learning how to shake your ass to the video above, here’s some tips.
And to clear your mind of the fuckery I just put it through…some John Coltrane.
Pimps up, hoes down.